We Belong
by Scherezade7
Summary: Trapped between two worlds. Caught between duty and desire. Kagome and Inuyasha struggle to find themselves as they come to realize one powerful truth about their feelings for one another.
1. Realizations

A/N: Sad to say, I don't own Inuyasha or any of the other characters below.

A big thank you to Shaeya Sedjet Namir, Sueric, and Trusuprise for their comments on the story thus far!

Key:

"…" spoken conversation

'…' character thoughts

Haafu - part-Japanese foreigner; "half"

Baka – idiot

Himono - dried and salted fish

Goshinboku – Sacred Tree or here, God Tree

Youki - a _Youkai_'s power or energy

Today had been really quite a strange day, almost too strange for Kagome to take it all in. During lunch period, she had looked around the schoolyard for Eri, Ayumi, and Yuka as she tried to avoid Houjo; it really was unlike them to leave her by herself, especially after one of her prolonged absences. When she finally spotted Ayumi and Yuka, it was in the company of two unfamiliar boys. Not wanting to interrupt the foursome, Kagome scanned the grounds again as she chewed her lip and wondered where Eri was. The sound of girlish laughter pulled Kagome from her thoughts and she turned towards the source only to see both Ayumi and Yuka walking towards her with matching grins, sparkling eyes, and rosy blushes. Confused as to what had put her friends into such good moods, Kagome asked the first thing that popped into her mind, "Yuka, Ayumi…who were those guys you were just talking to?"

"Kago, stop kidding around…you remember my boyfriend Haru, ne?" giggled Yuka.

"What? When did you start going out with him?" asked a dumbfounded Kagome as she stared at the spot where the boys had been standing. When had they met these boys? And why was this the first time she was hearing about the fact that her friend was going out with someone? Kagome couldn't help but feel hurt and more than a little left out as she looked at the grinning pair in front of her.

"We've been together since last December, silly…you're such a goof."

"And the other one…well, the slightly taller guy…that's Kyo. I met him at the last school dance." Ayumi chimed in.

"Kago…before you ask, Eri's current flavor of the month is Yuki." Ayumi continued, the laughter obvious in her voice. "Our little Eri has turned out to be quite the little heartbreaker."

Now Kagome definitely felt like she was in the Twilight Zone…the fact that her three friends were now dating was news to her. But Kagome was especially flabbergasted by Ayumi's comment about Eri…she had always been so shy and quiet when it came to boys. She didn't want to make herself sound more clueless, but Kagome had to ask, "Umm, girls, who is Yuki?"

"Really Kago, I know you've been sick and all but we're going to start feeling insulted if you keep forgetting about the loves in our lives." Teased Yuka. "Although, in Eri's case, it's justified if you can't remember her current boyfriend's name…she goes through them so quickly!"

"Nani? Since when? The last I remember, she had a crush on some upperclassmen. Ummm..what was his name…Sei?"

"Oh God Kagome! That was months ago!" laughed Yuka, "She's now seeing this dreamy university guy named Yuki. Seriously, if not for Haru, I might have tried to give her some competition for him."

As the first warning bell signaling the end of the lunch period rang out, Kagome found herself acting on auto pilot. She was overwhelmed by a rush of emotion - a sense of feeling completely out of place. Here she was with _her_ friends in _her_ own time but she knew next to nothing about their lives and they most certainly knew nothing about hers. While she wanted to blame it on them – be mad at the girls for keeping her in the dark about their boyfriends - Kagome knew that unlike herself, her friends had never intentionally kept parts of their lives hidden from her. Today's revelations were only a byproduct of the fact that she was unable to hang out with them on a regular basis and that she hardly came to school. Truth be told, even when she did see them, she felt like more of an observer. Kagome really couldn't relate to their talk about what was going on in the worlds of fashion, music, or school gossip.

Kagome's travels to the Feudal Era left her little time or inclination to catch up much with pop culture – it was funny how fighting demons while searching for pieces of a mystical jewel just seemed to make other things pale in comparison. Yet, despite the fact that Kagome had begun to relate less and less to Yuka, Eri, and Ayumi she always looked forward to seeing them – unless they were trying to push Houjo onto her or "talk sense" into her about her "rude boyfriend." Although, Kagome grudgingly had to admit that the threesome had backed off greatly about Inuyasha after meeting him at her home a while back. Sometimes, she still couldn't believe that he'd managed to almost reverse their previously negative opinions of him. At the moment, Kagome couldn't help but feel a strange sense of loss at today's revelations. The girls had all grown up together and been friends since elementary school. Kagome had always assumed their friendship was something that would last over time. The girls were a reminder of how her life was and maybe would have been if she hadn't fallen down the Bone Eater's Well on her 15th birthday.

They had been there for each other through so many crises – the realization that boys were not so annoying after all (once they stopped trying to rip up your homework, push you on the playground, and pull your hair), that math was an evil created to punish young girls, and that too much pocky in one sitting could make you really, really sick. But now, it was distressing to realize just how different they were all becoming.

The rest of the afternoon passed by in a blur and Kagome found herself counting down the minutes till she could leave school, leave this time, and head back to Inuyasha and to her other life in the Feudal Era. It was ironic really. Even with all the danger she faced in medieval Japan, as unsettled as Kagome was currently feeling, at least there, things were more certain. She had a duty to fulfill, friends to help, an enemy to fight. 'Gods, today really has been too much…just too much…' Kagome thought with exasperation as she stole another glance at the clock mounted on the wall in front of her. As soon as school was over for the day, Kagome was the first person out the door.

Kagome adjusted her schoolbag as she quickened her pace, forcing Yuka, Eri, and Ayumi to catch up to her. Not wanting to dwell on the strange gap that seemed to be growing between her and the other girls, Kagome forced herself to focus on returning to Inuyasha...and the others. Kagome had been in her time for three days now and if she knew Inuyasha, he would be arriving soon to make sure the "shard detector" returned to do her job. After traveling back and forth between times for over two years now, she had come to understand the half demon very well. Even though Kagome still negotiated with him to return to her time to visit family and take exams, her heart hadn't really been in it lately. Kagome knew that they were close to their final confrontation with Naraku since she and her friends had collected almost all of the Shikon Jewel. While Inuyasha's attitude towards her had changed much from their first encounter, his frustration at being made to wait to continue their search for jewel fragments when she took the time to return to the present, remained a constant source of arguments between the two. 'Just once, I'd like to be ready _before_ he makes it over to this side just so he can't complain…the way he acts, you'd think I was trying to leave him or that he misses me. Not that he'd _ever_ admit to that!'

Mentally running through the items that she wanted to pack for her return trip, Kagome failed to notice a familiar figure approaching the group on his bicycle. Only Ayumi and Yuka's cry of "Houjo-kun!" brought Kagome back to present company. She looked up to see the boy pull up next to her and fumble for a small package that had been housed in a bag he had strapped at the back of his bike.

"Higurashi, I hope that you're feeling a lot better today…you left the classroom before I could give this to you." He said with as shy smile.

Kagome inwardly groaned. While she was flattered that Houjo – who most would say was one of the finest catches at their school – was interested in her, she did not return the boy's affections. It really was only at the insistence of Yuka, Eri, and Ayumi that she had gone out with him a few times at all. Speaking of the girls, they had not so discretely moved away so that Kagome and Houjo were given a little privacy. While Yuka and Ayumi were deep in conversation, Kagome noticed Eri standing stiffly with tight lips – and was Eri glaring at her?

Kagome shook her head and said "I'm sorry Houjo-kun, I spaced out for a moment. What did you say again?"

Smiling, the boy held out the package, "That's just it. This tea is supposed to have wonderful restorative properties. It's excellent for improving memory, concentration, and the immune system. I just thought that since you've been sick so much, this might help you out."

'Gods Grandpa, with the crazy excuses you make up for my absences, it's a wonder that people don't submit my name to the Guinness Book of World Records for being the sickest girl on the planet.' Kagome blinked. She had spaced out again.

"I was just wondering if you weren't busy this Saturday, maybe we could go see a movie?" Houjo continued, a goofy grin still on his face.

Kagome looked at him and felt the familiar stirring of pity – she knew how badly it hurt to feel rejected by the object of your affection. While Kagome didn't think Houjo's feelings for her ran that deep, she found it difficult to look him straight in the eye and turn him down. But, at the same time, she knew that Inuyasha would never let her come back to her time so soon…let alone for a date. 'Who are you kidding Kagome, you know you shouldn't lead him on anyways, you know that he doesn't remotely compare to Inuyasha.'

Before Kagome could give her reply, Yuka and Ayumi ran up to the couple and excitedly accepted on Kagome's behalf amidst giggles and squeals. Kagome looked on in a daze as Houjo, Yuka, and Ayumi seemed to be negotiating details 'What the heck, am I not standing here?!' She glanced over at Eri who had remained silent and tense the entire time and was surprised to see the glare that she had thought she had seen on her friend's face earlier, being directed at her 'Ok, I am definitely not imagining things…'

As Houjo was riding off and the girls resumed walking, Kagome snapped out of the haze that had settled over her mind, "You guys, why do you keep pushing me to go out with him? He's nice but I'm not interested."

"Nonsense Kagome! It's because of that Inuyasha guy that you're infatuated with – the one who crashed Eri's recital - is that why you won't give Houjo-kun a chance?"

"Look, let's leave him out of it…I already have plans for Saturday evening."

"Why didn't you say anything sooner Kagome, we could have asked him to take you on Friday instead. And you could double with Haru and I." came Yuka's bubbly reply.

'Argh they are NOT listening…this is getting really annoying.' Kagome thought as she tried to stamp down the feeling of bitterness at hearing Yuka mention her "boyfriend's" name. 'The boyfriend I only found out about today…'

The group of girls was now standing in front of the Higurashi Shrine and Kagome looked nervously in the direction of the well house – hoping that she wouldn't see a red and silver blur streak towards her. With her luck, she'd have to excuse Inuyasha's sudden appearance to her friends. Without anything to cover his ears or a human appearance courtesy of the new moon, Kagome's ability to creatively explain her way out of the situation would be sorely tested.

"Girls, I'd love to discuss this some other time...but I really have to hurry right now." Kagome was becoming extremely conscious of the time… 'Inuyasha might already be here…and I really don't want them to see him in the midst of a temper tantrum – then I'm sure they'd change their mind about him not being that bad after all.'

As the girls made their goodbyes, Eri caught Kagome's eye and quietly asked if they could talk for a few minutes. Kagome nodded and pointed in the direction of the God Tree. As she walked over, Kagome thought she detected Inuyasha's youki and she looked around anxiously for a moment. 'He's so impatient…if he was really here, he would have swooped in on me by now. I must just be sensing his connection to the Goshinboku. Or maybe I've missed him so much that I'm just imagining that I feel his aura.' Satisfying herself with that explanation, Kagome waited for Eri to say something. Despite feeling pressed for time, Kagome really wanted to know what she had done to earn the glares her friend had been giving her during their walk to the Shrine.

"Kagome, how can you be so selfish?!" hissed an angry Eri. Neither girl was aware of the figure perched high in the God Tree's branches whose golden eyes snapped open at those words.

Inuyasha had been feeling so lost for the past three days while Kagome was in her own time that he had taken to sleeping in the God Tree outside of her house at night. This way, he could stay near her aura and scent, both of which never failed to calm him. Of course, he would never tell_ her_ that. Knowing that this was Kagome's last day in her time – for a long while he promised himself silently - he had arrived while she was in school and had fallen asleep in the Goshinboku while awaiting her return. 'Hmm, my bitch is back…'bout fuckin' time._' _came the lazy thought as Inuyasha gradually woke upon detecting Kagome's presence. Only the accompanying scent of another female kept him from reflexively leaping down from the tree to greet Kagome. It was one of her friends. 'The Eri-girl,'Inuyasha thought as he huffed in annoyance. Inuyasha shuddered, remembering the last time he had been surrounded by Kagome's girl friends. Their giggles and squeals had him trying to flatten his sensitive ears under the scarf he had tied around his head while helping Kagome's grandfather clear out the Shrine's storeroom.

Eri's words snapped Inuyasha into total wakefulness. He could hear the anger directed at Kagome in the girl's voice, and his senses went into full alert as he tried to determine if the girl posed any danger to Kagome.

"What?"

"You heard me! And don't play innocent with me. I never would have figured you to be the type who enjoyed wrapping boys around her finger!"

"Eri, I really don't know what you're talking about! Who do I have wrapped around my finger?" Kagome began, feeling completely bewildered. Of all the things for her friend to say, she had _not_ been expecting this. She was so taken aback that Kagome failed to register the irony for a moment – here was Eri, whom Ayumi had termed a "heartbreaker" - accusing Kagome of the same thing?

"You lead Houjo-kun on as if you have feelings for him only to turn around and break your dates or cut them short. You're out of school most of the time and yet all it takes is for you to batt your eyelashes and Houjo-kun is all over you again!"

Kagome gawked in amazement at Eri. She had become quite accustomed to having her friends practically shove her and Houjo together at every opportunity. They never took any of Kagome's protests or excuses seriously, which annoyed Kagome and made her feel even more awkward about the whole situation. The fact that Eri seemed to have picked up on her reluctance to start a relationship with Houjo thrilled her – until the rest of her brain processed Eri's angry words and posture. "Eri, you know as well as I do that I have _never _acted like that with Houjo-kun! Most of the times I've been out with him are because all of you have accepted on my behalf."

"So you're trying to tell me that you have no feelings for Houjo-kun at all? That you don't enjoy the attention he pays you or the gifts that he gives you? Do you realize that more than half the girls in the school are after him? And yet since we've all been little kids he's only wanted you! And you – you just let him think that it's possible. Every time it seems that he might be able to get over you, you come back and he falls back into the same pattern…and I hate it!"

Inuyasha flattened his ears against the rising pitch of Eri's angry voice. Having determined that Kagome was not in any physical danger, Inuyasha decided to stay where he was and to listen to the exchange for now. He had heard that bastard Houjo's name mentioned and had to suppress the possessive growls that seemed to reflexively well up in his throat. 'Keh, weak human boy couldn't fight off a demon to save his own life, let alone Kagome's.' Inuyasha thought with some derision, recalling the time Kagome had accidentally allowed a possessed himono to be let loose in her school. Besides, Inuyasha wanted to hear Kagome's answers.

"Eri, I do _not _have feelings for Houjo-kun and, I've told all of you that before! How can I when I'm already in love with Inu-" Kagome clamped a hand over her mouth…this was NOT the way she wanted to make a declaration of love for the hanyou. Kagome had accepted her feelings for Inuyasha the day that she had seen him promising his life to Kikyou, but she had never _ever _said the words out loud to anyone else. Not even Sango had been able to get her to confess, although Kagome was pretty sure that the demon slayer suspected that her feelings for the half demon ran deeper than a girlish crush. 'Oh Gods, what if he's around…oh Gods…what if he's heard me?' Kagome's thoughts circled around in a haze of embarrassment as she cast guilty glances back over towards the well house.

Inuyasha in the meantime couldn't believe his ears. It had taken all of his physical control not to fall out of the tree in shock at what Kagome had almost blurted out. 'I knew she cared about me…but is she…did she….did she almost say that she's fuckin' in love with me?!?' While Inuyasha's heart lurched with happiness at the thought, his mind tried to brush off what he had just heard as wishful thinking. Kagome was too innocent and sweet. She deserved so much more than the love of a dirty half-breed…especially one who wasn't even from her time. And yet, the fact that Kagome's scent had just spiked with anxiety as she looked around frantically for anyone who may have overheard her, made him think that maybe she _had _been about to confess her feelings for him.

"You're talking about Inuyasha, that haafu boy, aren't you?" Eri asked quietly.

Kagome couldn't meet her friend's eyes and turned towards the God Tree, her hand absently rubbed against the scar left on the trunk from Kikyou's sealing arrow, "You know, all of you are wrong about him. He's not a two timer because he and I were never together..._that _way. I was just upset when I first told all of you about him."

Inuyasha meanwhile had finally figured out that all the references about the "two timing jerk" her friends had ever tossed out – had been about him! 'What the heck has she been telling her friends about me?!' he fumed.

The girls remained silent for a while before Kagome tentatively asked, "Eri, you like Houjo-kun don't you? Is that why you're upset with me?"

It was Eri's turn to look away. "Kagome, I've been friends with Houjo-kun since we were five years old and he is one of the nicest and cutest boys we know. And yet, _everyone_ knows that he has eyes only for you. It's been like that since grade school."

"That's why Yuka and Ayumi keep trying so hard to get you two together. Even after we met Inuyasha for ourselves and saw that he wasn't that bad a person and was actually quite good looking, Yuka and Ayumi couldn't get over the idea of setting you up with Houjo-kun. Now that Haru and Kyo have become friends with him, they're more determined than ever."

"Yuka and Ayumi don't realize that you're interested in him?" came Kagome's quiet voice.

Eri sighed and frowned, "I've never told them. I want to…but every time I try…my throat closes up. Everyone thinks that you two would make such a great couple. Then there's me, the good friend who should _want_ both of you to get together because it would make _him_ happy."

Turning to look at Kagome, Eri's voice throbbed with emotion as she said, "I know that you think Houjo-kun is…kind of dull. But I swear, it's like he changes when you come around – he's usually not like that – it's like he becomes a different person! If you're not interested in him, I just wish you'd let some of us other girls have a chance at winning him over. I wish you'd let him have a chance at being happy with someone else."

Again, silence came between the two girls. Eri's last comments had deflated any of Kagome's anger and left her with a greater understanding of her friend's feelings. In her mind's eye, Kagome could see the last encounter the group had with Kikyou. Inuyasha had stopped everything he was doing to run after her soul stealers, a shuttered expression on his face. He had returned with a vacant look in his eyes. 'Every time she comes around, I can't help but wonder if she'll succeed in dragging him to hell…if he would really just forget about all of us...forget about the quest…forget about _me_ so easily…'

Inuyasha could smell the salt from the tears that Kagome was trying to hold back and every instinct in him was itching to go comfort her…or distract her by making her mad…anything to stop her from crying, 'Gods, I can't stand her tears!' Suppressing the urge to do something, he waited for her to speak.

"Eri, will you believe me when I tell you that I _do _know how you feel? And I swear to you, I'll do whatever it takes to help you?"

Eri gave a humorless chuckle, "Are you making fun of me Kagome? You're telling me that YOU, one of the most sought after girls at school, the one that Houjo-kun has been trying to ask out for over one year, know what it's like to feel the way I do right now? Sorry, if I can't believe you."

Kagome looked at her friend in genuine shock, a blush staining her cheeks, "Eri, what are you talking about? How am I so sought after?"

"My god Kagome, do you ever look in the mirror? You are one of the prettiest girls at school – you don't even try hard to look good but you do. Not only that, up to the time you started to get sick, everyone knew that you were one of the top students in the class. And you're nice to everyone. God, even right now, when I want to be mad at you…I can't. No wonder Houjo-kun is love with you!"

Inuyasha had been silently agreeing with all the attributes that Eri had been pointing out. 'Bitch doesn't know what she's got. She draws everyone to her…Kouga…Houjo…the pathetic human men in the villages we've been stopping at lately...' Inuyasha couldn't help the possessive fury that went through his system at the thought of the other males trying to win over her affection. 'She fuckin' belongs with ME.' Even as the thought ran through him, his conscience pricked him for his selfishness. How could he even try to claim her as his when Kikyou was walking the earth again, suffering again? Inuyasha's internal dialogue was cut off when conversation resumed beneath him once more.

"Eri, Houjo-kun is _not _in love with me! He may think he feels strongly for me…but he can't… he doesn't know anything about me. He has feelings for some image of me – some image that is probably perfect and so different from I really am like. I am not the same girl that he used to play with in the sandbox years ago! I've changed…I've seen things…done things…that make me so different from the girl he knew."

"But still, it doesn't help to hear me say that, does it? No matter how much he hurts you by looking at another…no matter how much he annoys you…you still can't stand the idea of him being in pain or suffering, can you?"

Eri turned to look at Kagome who was running her hand lightly over the scar on the God Tree's trunk. "You're thinking about him again aren't you? Kago, you say you aren't together, but you really are in love with Inuyasha, aren't you?"

Kagome turned to look at Eri and the tears that she had been struggling to keep back, finally rushed their way to the surface, "Eri, I love him so much that it hurts! But he doesn't love me…he still wants Kikyou. She's beautiful, talented, and powerful…she's so much better than me! I'm just a reminder of everything he's lost."

Inuyasha felt his own heart bursting painfully in his chest at Kagome's words and he dug his claws into the palms of his hands letting the blood drip down onto the branch he was perched on as her sobs echoed in his ears. 'Fuck! I never knew how deep her feelings ran. I just wanted to keep her the away from me. I didn't want her to be able to hurt _me_…I didn't even think I could hurt her like this…'

The girls were now clinging to one another for comfort – all traces of the earlier anger now gone. As Kagome's sobs died down, Eri's curiosity got the best of her, "Kago, who is Kikyou?"

Kagome suddenly felt very foolish. 'Did I need to cry that badly? Now, I've got to come up with some explanation that doesn't involve the Feudal Era or demons…gods, why can't the ground open up and swallow me now?!' But another part of Kagome was longing for a chance to confide in one of her oldest friends. She had kept so much from Yuka, Ayumi, and Eri for over two years now. After all if she wasn't living her own life Kagome certainly wouldn't believe half of what she experienced herself. But today, Kagome had felt so lost as she had stood on the school grounds listening to Yuka and Ayumi talk about their boyfriends. Her three friends had all begun dating and sharing the same experiences while Kagome was the outsider...the one who had been left behind. Even though Sango was like a sister to her, part of Kagome desperately missed feeling close to the girls she had grown up with…the girls she had spent many sleepovers with chatting about all sorts of innocent gossip and dreams for their future. 'It's been so long since I've been able to talk to any of the girls in my time about boys…or about the one boy who I'd do anything for…Eri has known me for so long, it would be nice to hear what she has to say…'

"Eri, do you remember anything about Inuyasha? I mean from that time that you met him here at my house?" asked Kagome.

After wrinkling her forehead and thinking for a moment, Eri replied, "Well, with a name like Inuyasha, we figured he was part of a gang. But then he interrupted our school recital and his acting was pretty convincing, even though it was completely unexpected! And then of course his clothing…when we saw him at your place, it looked like he was wearing an old fashioned shrine outfit."

Kagome silently thanked the Gods for giving her a way out, "Yes, he's in a gang, actually it's more like an acting troop that stages fights, but he was going to leave it for Kikyou – his first girlfriend. Before he could do that, Naraku, a guy from a rival acting troop, tricked Inuyasha and Kikyou into turning against one another, because he wanted Kikyou for himself. Nobody knew this at the time and Kikyou ended up getting hurt and still blames Inuyasha for it."

"Well, that's odd Kagome. If you're right that Inuyasha had nothing to do with what happened to Kikyou, why does she hold him responsible for it?"

Kagome was quiet for a moment before carefully saying, "After she was hurt, Kikyou changed a great deal. I didn't know her before, but I think she must have been a good person for Inuyasha to care so much about her. But she is different now. Even her own sister, thinks so. I think the only one who doesn't see it is Inuyasha."

"Maybe it's because he still only sees who she was before? What were you saying about Houjo-kun earlier – about him loving some image of you that wasn't real - maybe it's the same for Inuyasha?"

"I don't know Eri. Inuyasha is a very honorable and loyal person – and really, that's part of why I love him. I can't fault him for his feelings. I just wish Kikyou wouldn't hurt him so much. I feel like she rubs his feelings in his face…if you could only see the lost look in his eyes after she visits him…" Kagome's voice trailed off as she again recalled the last time she saw Inuyasha after Kikyou had left the group again. His normally vibrant eyes had looked so empty, Kagome's own heart broke for him.

Inuyasha's dark eyebrows shot up in amazement at Kagome's words, 'She feels pain because she thinks that Kikyou is hurting me? I know this Kikyou is not the same one who was alive 50 years ago…it's taken me a fuckin' long time to realize it, but I _do _know...oh..Kagome…'

"Kagome, does Inuyasha know how you feel?"

Shaking her head, Kagome turned again to look at the God Tree, "I don't know if he's guessed. But I'll never tell him…I don't want to make him think that I want him to choose between Kikyou and myself. I know that in his eyes, I could never even compare with her. I'll just be his friend for as long as he'll let me, I'll help him as long as he'll let me…and then after that…after that…I don't know."

"But this is entirely unfair to you! And what exactly are you trying to help him with that's so important?!" spluttered Eri out of indignation for her friend.

"Eri, Naraku is a nasty person who is hungry for power and doesn't care who he hurts to get it. Inuyasha has been trying to stop him from taking over other gangs…I mean acting troops." Kagome kept her face averted as she mumbled this last part, hating herself for telling yet another lie to a friend, 'Sorry Eri, as silly as this sounds, that's the best I can do. I can't exactly blurt out that Naraku is trying to take over all of Japan and possibly even the world and that we're trying to put together the legendary Shikon Jewel, now can I?'

Eri sighed and said, "Why do I feel as if there's more to this story than what you're telling me Kago?" A few moments passed where Kagome avoided looking at Eri, choosing to stare at the God Tree instead.

"So, is Inuyasha going to leave this…err…group…once this Naraku guy is taken care of?"

"I don't know Eri. Whatever he decides to do…whether he stays the same or changes into something else…I want him to be happy. I love him for who he is. I accept him as he is. I just wish he could feel the same about me."

"Why doesn't he?"

"Eri, he's still in love with Kikyou…despite everything she's done to him…despite the way she's threatened me…"

"What?! Kikyou has threatened you before?"

Inuyasha's normally amber eyes suddenly flashed crimson at Kagome's revelation and he tightened his grip on Tetsusaiga. 'I never knew…I wasn't sure what Kikyou had done to Kagome…but Kagome wouldn't tell me.'

Kagome nervously looked over at the well house again, and said softly "Look it was a long time ago. I don't know if Kikyou really meant to hurt me. I can't -no - I won't believe that Inuyasha could still have feelings for someone who was deliberately cruel. But I do think that what happened to Kikyou has changed her. And I know she doesn't want me around. Sometimes it seems that she thinks I'm trying to replace her in Inuyasha's heart. You know, we kind of look alike."

Kagome paused as she closed her eyes and the only evidence of emotion was the slight tremble in her voice, "But what Kikyou doesn't seem to understand is that she is the only one who holds his affections. Every time she comes around, Inuyasha forgets all about the rest of us…he forgets about _me_. And…I'm always so afraid that one day he just won't come back. That she'll succeed in dragging him 'to hell' down with her like she wants to…"

Inuyasha felt like howling…felt like tearing out his own ears…he didn't want to hear any of this. He didn't want to hear any more of how his thoughtless words and actions had caused Kagome pain. Inuyasha was suddenly drowning in a sea of emotion that was threatening to overwhelm him. Long suppressed ideas, feelings, hopes, and dreams suddenly flared to life as he processed Kagome's words. 'She loves me…Kagome fuckin' loves _me._ She thinks that I am in love with Kikyou and that I only see her as Kikyou's replacement.' For so long Kagome had been like the sun, something so warm, so beautiful, so hopelessly out of reach that he was content to bask simply in her presence. Inuyasha hadn't wanted to develop feelings for the young miko, and so he acted out in every way that he could. He called her names, pushed away her offers of help, insulted her, and compared her looks and talents to Kikyou. 'I've been hurting her so much all this time. She's so good at hiding her feelings! I knew that she cared but I never had any idea about how deep her feelings ran.' Inuyasha scowled, 'Or maybe I just didn't want to acknowledge it...didn't want it to seem real…then I'd have to do something about it. Damn, I _am_ a selfish baka!'

"No, Kikyou has no idea how much Inuyasha still loves her. But I can see it. He tries to hide it, but I've caught him looking at me with such an intense expression when he thinks that I don't notice. At those times, I know he's not seeing me - he's seeing her. But Eri, I can't be her…even as much as I love Inuyasha…I can't be someone I'm not for him."

"Oh Kagome, you shouldn't have to! You love him for who he is – and you deserve to have the same in return!"

"Eri, thank you. I know you think I'm wrong to be involved with Inuyasha. I think he even thinks so too – I know he cares about me…as a 'shard detector'…friend…he even tried to keep me away from him once to keep me out of trouble I think. I didn't know it at the time and I was furious with him! Then I thought 'Ok, he doesn't want me with him. He doesn't need my help, I'm going to forget about him.' Around that time, Houjo-kun had asked me to go to WacDonalds, and I actually said yes." Kagome shot Eri a guilty look, "I was determined to forget that Inuyasha ever existed…after all, he apparently could do it. I should've been able to also, right?"

'Fuck Kagome, you don't know how wrong you are! The minute I pushed you down the well and sealed it, I felt like I had lost a piece of myself. But the thought…the idea…of you getting' hurt because of me scared me even more. I thought I was doing the right thing in sending you away, even if not seeing you again killed me on the inside.'

"But the entire time I was with Houjo-kun, I kept thinking about Inuyasha. I really felt like he needed me. Eri, it will sound so strange to say this, but I really feel connected to him. As much as he hurts me, as much as I hurt for him, I can't get away from this feeling…I feel like I belong with him…" Kagome looked at Eri sheepishly. "I know you think I'm probably crazy…"

"No, Kago. I don't know if he's the type of boy I would have pictured you falling in love with… but we've been friends for so long. I know that you're serious about what you're saying. I just want you to be happy."

Inuyasha swallowed hard as he tried to keep a firm control over his emotions. 'So do I. Kagome, you deserve so much more than me…you should be happy. If I wasn't such a selfish bastard, I'd seal up the well again and keep you away from me…'

"But I _am _happy Eri. As long as Inuyasha let's me stay by his side, I can't ask for anything more. That time when Inuyasha kept me from seeing him, I discovered something about myself. I don't stay with him because I'm such a saint…I'm selfish too. I need to be with him just as much as I need the air to breathe. I would be miserable without him in my life."

"Besides, I promised him that I'd never leave him alone if I could help it. Eri, he has had such a hard life and yet he is so strong...such a good person…in spite of everything he's been through. Even if it was easy for me to leave him, to never see him again, that would be wrong. Especially if I was doing it just because he doesn't return my feelings. Then I'd be just like everybody else he's met…people who've wanted him to change, to forget who he is because he doesn't fit their expectations."

Inuyasha closed his eyes as he felt raw emotion overtake him again, 'Gods, what did I do to deserve the love of this wonderful woman?' With just a few words, he felt so humbled by everything that was Kagome – the honesty of her expressions, the quiet passion behind her words, the nuances of her voice. 'And I tried so damn hard to keep her out of my heart…to not fuckin' need her as much as I do. In spite of how I've treated her she still wants to stay with me. She still wants to love me.' Inuyasha had never felt so conflicted in his life – part of him was elated at her confession to her friend while the rest of him was deeply ashamed that he'd made her feel so miserable. 'Somehow Kagome, somehow I swear to the Kami I _will_ make things right, I'll make everything up to you.'

Kagome took the opportunity then to ask Eri something that had been plaguing her ever since her conversation with Yuka and Ayumi at lunch. "Eri, now I know you have strong feelings for Houjo-kun…but earlier today, I heard that you're seeing a university boy?"

Eri blushed and looked away before asking Kagome, "You think I'm an awful person, don't you?"

"No, why would I think that?" came Kagome's quick response. While she didn't know everything that was going on with Eri and was still startled at the idea of her friend being such a flirt, Kagome knew her friend could not have changed _that _much.

"I'm sure the other two told you that I've been with lots of boys…" Seeing the shocked look on Kagome's face, Eri quickly added, "No, not THAT way!"

"Ok…go, on."

"Well, it's not like I haven't tried to get over the idea of being with Houjo-kun. Every time I meet a new boy who's interested in me, I think 'Maybe, with him…maybe I'll forget about Houjo-kun with him.'"

"But?" Kagome prompted when Eri stopped speaking.

"But, it just doesn't seem to work! For a little while, it's a lot of fun. And it's nice to feel cared about…to have a boy pay so much attention to you, flatter you, and treat you like you're the most important person in the room. But then, I find myself wishing that he was Houjo-kun…that it was Houjo-kun saying those things to me. That's when I know that it's time to end the relationship, when I no longer see the boy I'm with as his own person, but as a substitute."

As Eri had been speaking, an image of Kouga had come unbidden to Kagome's mind along with an uncomfortable thought, 'Have I been doing the same thing with Kouga-kun? Inuyasha always accuses me of encouraging his attention and I've always brushed off his angry words. Could he actually be right?'

The girls had grown silent again, each lost in her own thoughts when suddenly Eri laughed, "Kagome, what is it with your fascination with this tree? Ever since we were kids, and your grandfather told us some story about a demon who'd been buried under it, you've been slightly obsessed."

"What?!" Kagome turned her startled face towards Eri.

"Hey, don't look so shocked! You don't remember? You'd stare at the tree for hours when we were little…I sometimes thought you were expecting it to talk to you!"

"Hmm…I'd forgotten about that. I guess this tree has always been special to me." Kagome said in a soft voice as she smiled in the God Tree's direction. "And I believe in the story the half-demon was pinned to the tree...not buried beneath it."

Eri looked at her friend in surprise, "Well, I suppose _you_ would remember the story. You've probably heard it a thousand times from your grandfather!"

Deciding it was past time to change the conversation, Kagome turned to her friend with a bright smile and said, "Speaking of our childhood, I seem to recall that you had a fascination with fairytales and finding your very own Prince Charming."

Standing up, Kagome glanced at her watch and then brushed off her skirt, giving Eri a smile, "While there's nothing I can do about my situation, I promise you that I will think of a way to get Houjo-kun's interest off of me and for him to notice you. After all, Princess Eri deserves her Prince Houjo…"

The girls burst into laughter at the silliness of the words. It was a welcome change from the heaviness of their prior conversation. Looking down again at her watch, Kagome sighed and said, "I have to get going now. But Eri, I'm so glad that you stopped to talk to me. I know I haven't been very good about keeping up with everything that's been going on with all of you."

"Kago, don't be silly! We know you've been sick lately. But you're right, I'm glad we talked. It was killing me to be so mad at you."

Kagome smiled warmly at Eri and said, "Yeah, I'm glad that we got that all cleared up. But do me a favor? Please promise me, you won't breathe a word about Kikyou and Inuyasha to Yuka or Ayumi."

Eri turned to her with a serious expression and said "I promise. If you won't mention what I've told you about Houjo-kun to them."

The girls' voices faded as they walked towards the edge of the Shrine property with linked arms. Inuyasha took the opportunity to leap out of the tree and streak towards the well house. His head was spinning with all that he had heard today and Inuyasha knew he had much to think about and needed to be alone to do so. Racing towards the village, he found Sango and Miroku and asked them to wait for Kagome by the well saying that he had some business to take care of that would keep him away for a few days. The red and silver blur was gone as soon as he was satisfied that Kagome would not be left to walk unprotected back to the village.

Given how late she was in returning to the Feudal Era, Kagome was shocked to find no trace of an impatient but impossibly handsome Inuyasha at the other side of well. She instead found herself in the company of Sango, Miroku, and Shippo. Unable to disguise her disappointment, Kagome barely managed to call out a surprised greeting to her friends before she blurted out the one question she couldn't stop thinking of from the moment she had climbed out of the well.

"Where's Inuyasha…I would've thought that he would be waiting to chew my head off for returning late?"

Miroku cast a sly glance at her, "Eh, Kagome-sama, we were hoping _you_ could tell us what is going on with our impetuous friend. A little while ago, he asked us to wait for you by the well because he said that he had some business to take care of and that he would be away for a few days."

"No, I haven't seen him since I was last here…"

The group was silent for a few minutes before Kagome hesitantly asked, "Have you seen Kikyou's soul stealers nearby? Has she called him?" 'Oh god, I don't want to know…but I have to…please say you haven't seen them…'

"Actually Kagome-sama, I have neither seen nor detected their presence in the area."

With that reply, the group continued its trek back to the village in silence. For once, even Shippo seemed to sense that his lighthearted chatter would be inappropriate as everyone pondered over Inuyasha's actions. Kagome's thoughts kept dwelling on Inuyasha's unusual behavior. It was unlike him to leave the village for anything but hunting for jewel shards. For him to have left alone and without his "shard detector" –'And right before I came back' - made no sense. And if it wasn't Kikyou calling him out, then what kind of "business" did he have to take care of? Kagome sighed quietly. She felt more than a little disappointed that Inuyasha hadn't waited to see her before leaving the village. 'I know it's only been three days, but I feel like I haven't seen him in forever. Right now, I think I even miss hearing him yell at me for being late…'

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A/N: Please read and review. I'd love to hear your thoughts about the story thus far. This is my first attempt at a multi-chaptered fanfic, so feedback – especially if it's constructive – will be appreciated!


	2. Reflections

A/N: I still don't own Inuyasha or any of the other characters below.

A big thank you to Trusuprise and YoukaiMusashi for their comments on the story thus far! Please check out their stories on this site for excellent plots and quality writing! Can't thank these ladies enough for taking the time to help me clear my thoughts…and for encouraging me!

Key:

"…" spoken conversation

'…' character thoughts

Furisode: "virginal" kimono style with long sleeves worn by unmarried, young women

San-san-ku-do: 'three-times-three-sips' part of traditional Japanese Shinto wedding where the bride and groom drink sake together

* * *

As soon as Inuyasha left the boundaries of the village, he took off at the fast pace he enjoyed traveling when on his own. It had been too long since Inuyasha had been able to push his muscles to the limit, allowing the wind to whip through his hair as he ran just for its own sake – no specific destination in mind, no youkai to fight, no friends to rescue...no strangely dressed miko to save.

"_I love him so much that it hurts!"_

Villages and isolated huts flashed by as Inuyasha picked up speed allowing turbulent emotions to translate into action as he recalled Kagome's privately spoken words.

"_But he doesn't love me…he still wants Kikyou."_

With the slightest shift in position, Inuyasha leapt into the air, reveling in the temporary weightlessness of being airborne, of being free. If only it were that easy to quell the heaviness that clutched his heart, tugged at his mind.

"_I love him for who he is. I accept him as he is."_

Barely suppressing a snarl, Inuyasha landed with great agility only to take off again. To an onlooker, the hanyou was sheer poetry in motion – fluid grace punctuated by crimson, silver, and gold.

"_I love him…"_

Inuyasha pushed himself harder…but try as he might, he couldn't outrun Kagome's desperate voice that replayed over and over in his head.

"_I love him…"_

Blood pounded in his ears along with the whistling of the wind. Inuyasha, normally so attuned to the world around him was completely oblivious to the scents and sounds that whipped by. There was only that voice…the echoing, sweet voice of the girl…of the miko…of the woman…he couldn't bring himself to face at the moment.

"_I LOVE HIM…"_

With a final leap, Inuyasha found himself gasping for breath at the edge of a large clearing that ended in a cliff overlooking a neighboring valley. A short distance away from the ground's edge stood a lone sakura tree, which was currently in bloom. Making his way over to the tree, Inuyasha bowed his head slightly and murmured, "Mother." After having buried his mother here as a child, Inuyasha had not been able to obtain a proper marker for her grave. Anger filled his golden eyes as he recalled how nobody had wanted to help an orphaned hanyou child honor his mother's memory.

'_Stay away, youkai filth! Your mother was a demon's whore – death is too good for the likes of her!'_

It had been the same situation no matter what village he had tried his luck at, whether he had approached his kin or complete strangers. But Inuyasha was determined…he would endure anything…any humiliation, any jibe as long as he could pay his mother the respect she deserved. Recalling her love of sakura blossoms, Inuyasha had searched far and wide for a sakura sapling to plant as the only marker for the site that was so dear to him. Over the years, he had watched the tree gain in height and width. The trunk now stood over one meter tall and was one quarter of a meter in circumference. At the moment, the sakura tree was in full bloom, so heavily populated with fragrant pink blossoms that it was hard to see the tree's branches. An idle breeze blew through the clearing, bringing the scent of sakura more strongly to his nose and a few flowers to his feet, as if in greeting. Smiling softly Inuyasha felt his angry memories leave him as he made his way over to the tree with emotion filled eyes.

This had been one of the first places he had visited after Kagome had unsealed him. Inuyasha had come to both pay respects to his mother and to assure himself that her grave had not been vandalized during the 50 years he had been in his enchanted sleep. Occasionally Inuyasha found himself here when he needed to get away from everything, when he needed time to think. After seating himself at the base of the tree so that he could look upon the large lake in the valley below, he closed his eyes and let the sound of the water splashing against the rocks below fill his ears.

'Love.'

'How can Kagome say that word so easily? And about me?' Inuyasha sighed as he leaned against the sakura tree's trunk. He was no fool and knew that Kagome had feelings for him. How could he not, with the way she worried for him…cried for him…tried to look after him when he was wounded? 'I've always known she's cared…as a friend. But she used the word _love_…'

Inuyasha had been rendered both shocked and awed by the girl's confession...that she felt so strongly for him…a hanyou. In the Feudal Era, "love" was something left for court poets, musicians, and foolish men to obsess about…make declarations for. Love was not the concern of warriors. And hanyou…a hanyou, most would say, had no right to exist or feel, let alone be the recipient of someone's affections. While Inuyasha was loathe to admit it out loud, in his heart he wondered if _they_ weren't right. His life had been filled with nothing but disappointment, jeering voices, and pain for so long. Everything, _everyone_ he touched seemed to be taken away from him… that is, until he met Kagome. With her, life somehow seemed better. Yes, there was pain…but there was also laughter and friendship. But was he worthy of this? Worthy of her? Would this happiness last?

"Keh. People in her time talk too damn much." Inuyasha scowled. From listening to the moving pictures that Kagome enjoyed watching during her visits to see family and friends, Inuyasha had realized people there spoke much more easily about their feelings than he was used to. 'Maybe that's why Kagome is so open about everything?'

Part of Inuyasha desperately wanted to believe this…believe that Kagome could not really _love_ him the way she had told the Eri girl…to discount her words as something people said casually in her time. But a larger part of him scoffed at his own cowardice, at the way he wanted to doubt Kagome. Inuyasha had smelled Kagome's anxiety…her fear…her sadness during her confession of love for him. No, her words hadn't been spoken casually at all. The girl had meant every syllable that had passed her sweet lips. And she had _not_ meant for Inuyasha to hear her. That alone convinced him of her sincerity. Kagome, his beautiful Kagome, always putting her feelings aside for others…for him. She had not wanted Inuyasha to know…did not want him to feel that he had to make a decision…

Inuyasha knew that Kagome's strength of heart and purity of soul were unique to her and her alone. 'Keh, Kagome'd be the same even if she had been born during this time. She's too damn trusting…so caring with everyone.'

No, Kagome's words and feelings could not be ignored. But what did that mean for Inuyasha? What did he feel for the girl?

"Do I…_love_…Kagome?" Inuyasha whispered softly, testing the way the words felt coming from his own tongue. Again, _that _four letteredword seemed to taunt him. He was a warrior, a fighter, a man of action…not words. Love. He had never questioned his own capacity to feel the emotion for anyone but his mother. Not even Kikyou had moved him to question the depth of his feelings for her…at least, not while she had been alive. Then, Kikyou had made all the decisions. Their plan for the future had really been Kikyou's…Inuyasha had simply been content to go along, satisfied with the knowledge that he would no longer be alone. Inuyasha grimaced as his mind replayed Kagome's words…her fears regarding himself and Kikyou.

"…_every time Kikyou comes around, Inuyasha forgets all about the rest of us…he forgets about me…and I'm always so afraid that one day he just won't come back…"_

'Kagome, that's what you truly think isn't it? That I can so easily forget you?' And Inuyasha knew he only had himself to blame for this. He inwardly winced as his conscience reminded him of all the mean spirited things he had ever said to her during his fits of anger or when he was feeling too vulnerable to her. The worst were the words he threw at Kagome when he compared her to Kikyou. Inuyasha was all too aware that she was insecure about the miko who she was supposed to be the reincarnate of. How could he not be, with the way Kagome's emotions were so easily spelled out in her eyes, expressions, and scent?

Inuyasha fluidly rose to a standing position so he could look upon the valley that was nestled beneath the crag he was standing on. The site was dazzling – lush greens broken only by a scattering of peasant huts. In the distance there was a scenic river, weaving its way towards the sea, a moving ribbon cutting through the land. But even more eye catching was the large lake, its surface so calm it seemed to be made of glass, which took up a central portion of the land below.

Thinking of Kikyou always left Inuyasha feeling unsettled. When he had first met her, the miko had simply been a means to an end. Inuyasha had wanted the Shikon jewel and she had it in her possession. As he stalked her to plot the best way to steal the jewel, Inuyasha couldn't help but notice how lonely Kikyou seemed. Even more shocking to him was the fact that Kikyou knew he was following her and didn't appear to mind – and in fact, seemed to seek out his company. After having been alone for so long, it felt good to be around someone who didn't want to kill him the moment he looked away. It felt so damn good to have someone speak to him without fear tinging their scent and curses and threats directed towards him in every sentence. Since the death of his own mother, Inuyasha had not experienced much gentleness in his life, and to have it come in the form of a miko – the sworn enemy of youkai – was strange. But for the first time since his mother's death, someone actually reminded Inuyasha that he was alive - that he was more than a misfit to be feared or ridiculed - that he was capable of still caring.

Inuyasha sighed as he recalled the events leading up to his sealing. Even now, Inuyasha didn't know if he really would have gone through with the wish to become human. It had been a spur of the moment promise; it was the only way Inuyasha could have had a future with Kikyou. She was tired of being the priestess who protected the sacred jewel, and given her training and beliefs, Kikyou had been unable to consider any relationship with Inuyasha while he was part youkai. Kikyou's request had made so much sense at the time. Yet even then, Inuyasha acknowledged that while the desire to fit in somewhere, to finally feel accepted was strong, some part of him had been uneasy about giving half of his heritage up…especially the physically stronger half. 'Would the fuckin' jewel have caused more problems with that wish? Would I have been happy if I had stayed in my human form forever?'

Inuyasha shook his head as if to clear his thoughts; they never had a chance to find out because of that bastard Naraku and his own evil schemes for the Shikon jewel. The events of that fateful day, now over 50 years ago had left him sealed to the Goshinboku with his human heart feeling betrayed and his youkai self lusting for revenge.

'Gods, I was so confused when Kagome unsealed me…' Inuyasha's thoughts trailed off as he closed his eyes, recalling the fateful day that he had been given a second chance at life…by Kagome's hands. Once the magic of the sealing spell had dissolved and Inuyasha first looked into Kagome's eyes, his human heart had reacted to her similarity to Kikyou while his inner youkai – with one sniff - wanted her…wanted to taste her…wanted to keep her near.

Never before had Inuyasha felt such a potent pang of desire for a girl. Kagome's scent of summer flowers was forever burned into his memory from that first day. Inuyasha's physical reaction to Kagome had both confused and frightened him. After his mother's death, Inuyasha had spent most of his energies on surviving. Teaching himself to find shelter, track and hunt, and defend himself from larger enemies were priorities. He had never had much interest in or use for the opposite sex. While his friendship with Kikyou had stirred a half forgotten need for…companionship, understanding, and acceptance…he had never been gripped by physical desire. But _now_, with the end of his enchanted sleep came an onslaught of feelings, triggered by this girl who stood before him, that caused heat to pool in his abdomen and his loins to tighten. The shock combined with his acute awareness of Kagome's proximity had caused Inuyasha to lash out at her – halfheartedly of course.

While 50 years had passed for the world around him, the events with Kikyou were branded freshly in his memory as if they had occurred yesterday. Inuyasha wasn't about to fall victim to another girl…especially another miko. And yet, to his horror, Inuyasha felt a helpless urge to be around Kagome – to be surrounded by her scent. The rushing of blood, pounding heart, and emotions too foreign to understand had made Inuyasha feel so vulnerable…Kagome made him feel vulnerable. And then, there was the matter of feeling duped and betrayed by Kikyou.

'No, it was that bastard Naraku!' Inuyasha reminded himself, not for the first time. Even after knowing the full story, it was hard for Inuyasha to erase the image of an angry Kikyou pointing a spirit-powered arrow at him, from his mind. Thankfully, fate had quickly given Inuyasha an outlet for the pent up aggression he felt whenever he reflected on that time – Naraku. The evil hanyou took sick pleasure in destroying so many people's lives – and was only too happy to twist the dagger into old wounds: taunting Inuyasha about the way he had turned Kikyou against him; turning Kohaku into a puppet; afflicting Miroku's family with a curse that carried through the generations.

It had taken Inuyasha a long time to come to terms with the events that had led to his being sealed, and it was Kagome with her gentle ways, warmth, and selfless courage that was key in all of this. Because of Kagome, Inuyasha had ended up with a pack – albeit a strange one – consisting of a perverted monk, a female demon exterminator, and an orphaned kitsune. But as peculiar as they were as a group, and as irritating as they could be as individuals, Inuyasha knew that he would do anything for them…and for Kagome…he would give his life.

Inuyasha's thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a child crying in the distance. Ears twitching towards the source, he found himself leaping off the cliff, in the direction of one of the settlements without a second thought.

'I'll just see why the brat's crying…that's all.' Inuyasha thought, 'Besides, all this thinkin' is making my head hurt.'

The child's voice seemed to originate close to a hut – a farm by the smell of it – near the lake, and Inuyasha turned gracefully in midair towards that direction. Through his travels with Kagome, Inuyasha had grudgingly become used to helping strangers out of a variety of predicaments, usually without benefit to himself. An image of Kagome's smiling face flashed through his mind – _she_ would no doubt expect him to go see what the kid was fussing about.

'Keh, I'm getting' soft.' Inuyasha thought, with a self deprecating smirk, 'But maybe that's not so bad…'

* * *

Kagome sighed as she continued to walk with her companions in silence. Her conversation with Eri as well as Inuyasha's absence weighed heavily on her mind as she and her friends headed towards Kaede's hut. As they drew closer to the village, Kagome could see that the place had been transformed. Colorful paper lanterns and streamers swung gaily from wires and poles while the sound of music and hammering filled the air along with the cries of street vendors. In the center of the village, finishing touches were being placed on a low, flat stage that would serve as the dance area for the night's festivities. Kagome's mouth started watering as the scent of frying food wafted over on the breeze.

"I completely forgot about the wedding!" Kagome exclaimed as she took in the way the quiet village had turned into a bustling center of action, filled with colorfully dressed strangers leading horses behind them, the gray dust of travel evident on their clothes.

How _could_ she have forgotten? After all, it wasn't every day that Kagome and her companions were invited to attend a village wedding as honored guests…by no less than one of the village's more prominent members. It was ironic, really. When Kagome had first found herself in Kaede's village, the inhabitants had thought her a demon or a spy from another town. Being found in the "Forest of Inuyasha" – holding onto the sleeping hanyou – had _not_ endeared her to the townsfolk. And they did not know what to make of her strange clothes or utterly confused state. But opinions had quickly changed once Kagome's status as the Shikon's guardian…as the reincarnate of the town's beloved Kikyou, became apparent. Even Inuyasha, who had once been mentioned in cautionary tales told to naughty children and frightening bed time stories, had undergone a transformation of image. The village children, or "whelps" as Inuyasha called them, were no longer frightened of him, much to Inuyasha's confusion and slight dismay. In fact, on most days, they could be seen running around, brandishing swords fashioned from tree branches, yelling "Tetsusaiga!" at the top of their lungs, engaging one another in mock battles.

As a group, the Inu-tachi were thought of with an affectionate hometown pride by the people in Kaede's village. True, the villagers were still privately scandalized by the length of the young miko's strange kimonos…and the fact that a female had chosen to become a demon exterminator, a job normally fit for men alone. Truer still, that the men were suspicious of the purple robed monk - he always seemed a little too friendly with the young women of the village – more than any other man of the cloth they had ever encountered. And as for the demons…most of the villagers were wise enough to know that their homes, crops, and very lives had been preserved on more than one occasion because other youkai did not want to face an enraged inu-hanyou, sly kitsune, and intimidating nekko youkai. If this protection meant that they had to swallow their natural revulsion of demons…their natural fear of non-humans, so be it. After all, they were simple farmers and tradesmen…a practical people.

"Kagome-sama, it is understandable…after all, you've been away for three days now and today has been a bit unusual, ne?" came Miroku's smooth reply.

"Even though it slipped my mind, I am looking forward to taking part in a traditional Shinto ceremony." Kagome said as she continued to observe the activities in the village.

"Why can't I come?" asked Shippo, glad that the uncomfortable silence that had surrounded everyone ever since his beloved Kagome had returned, had finally been broken.

"Shippo-chan, you know that only close family members and invited guests can attend the san-san-ku-do." Sango answered.

"But I want to see the 'three-times-three-sips' ceremony too!" he whined, "Why do Kagome and Miroku get to see it? They're not related to Taka-sama!"

Kagome smiled tolerantly at Shippo as she bent to ruffle his hair, "Shippo-chan, Taka-sama has invited us to help bless the ceremony. But everyone, including you and Sango-chan, are invited for the festivities afterwards. Okay?"

"Inuyasha too? Will Inuyasha be there as well?" Shippo asked innocently, oblivious to the reactions on his companions' faces.

Kagome stiffened and she had to work hard to keep a smile plastered on her face as her thoughts returned to the missing inu-hanyou. 'Inuyasha _will_ you be there? When will I see you again?'

"Come, Kagome-chan. You will want to rest a little before we get ready for the ceremony." Said Sango as she tugged on the miko's arm, encouraging her to continue the last few feet leading to Kaede's hut.

To the group's surprise, Kaede met them at the door.

"Ah young ones, ye are back I see. Come in, come in." the older woman called out in an excited voice.

"Kaede-baachan, it looked like you were just about to leave…please don't let us keep you." Said Kagome as she looked over at the older woman fondly.

"Nonsense child! These old bones were curious about the banging and clanging in the village square. Old Taka-sama seems to be sparing no expense for his only daughter's wedding. Kagome, this might be a small village…but you'll see, when a man's honor is involved, things get done on a large scale."

"Honor? What do you mean by that Kaede-sama?" asked a curious Miroku.

"Ah…well, it appears that Taka-sama wagered his daughter in a bet made under the influence of too much sake...and lost." Replied the older woman.

"What?!" came everyone's collective gasps of astonishment. While they had been invited to attend the wedding, the group had no idea about the events that had led up to it. After all, they normally spent most of their time _away_ from the village, trying to get leads on Naraku, trying to beat the evil hanyou to the few remaining shards. Naraku had gone into hiding again…that was the _only_ reason the group had agreed to attend the wedding…had agreed to stay in the village.

"Yes, it all started when…" Kaede began in a soft voice as she settled herself in a more comfortable position on a floor cushion.

Miroku, Sango, and even Shippo were so engrossed in Kaede's tale that they didn't notice Kagome quietly slip away from the hut to take a walk. Only Kirara, who had been basking in the dwindling sunlight outside of the hut took note of the girl's departure. The neko youkai uncurled her form slowly to arch and stretch her back before daintily following the young miko's footsteps.

Kagome sighed absentmindedly as she left the village outskirts, and its sounds of festive commotion, her feet leading her in the direction of the Goshinboku. Life in a small community revolved around gossip and even Kaede, the wise miko, was not immune to spreading tales of her neighbors' affairs. While Kaede's account was sure to be entertaining, Kagome didn't think she could stomach it today. She could accept many of the differences between the modern era and Feudal Japan, but it was hard for Kagome not to feel saddened by the way marriages were arranged during this time. Financial and social benefits were the usual reason to make a family alliance and love was a rarity. Besides, Kagome couldn't help but feel preoccupied. Her conversation with Eri was replaying in her mind, and Kagome found herself analyzing her friend's words and reactions.

The initial feeling of happiness at unburdening herself to her childhood friend was now dissipating into…a strange sadness. The girls had yelled at one another, cried, and laughed together…but had anything really changed? At first, Kagome had felt as if she was re-establishing a bond that she hadn't even realized had become weakened. But the stress of having to hold back from telling Eri the whole unvarnished truth about her life, the guilt that came with telling white-lies, were a sobering reality check. And then there was Eri's calm acceptance.

Kagome frowned as she tucked her skirt underneath and took a seat at the God Tree's base.

"How was I expecting Eri to react to what I said?

"Am I bothered because she seemed to believe me so easily? Didn't question me?

"Or, is it something else?"

Kagome shifted to lie down in the soft grass. The lingering heat of the day combined with the fatigue that always accompanied a good cry made Kagome's eyes feel heavy. Kirara was busy chasing a butterfly in the meadow and the birds were starting their tribute to the setting sun. The day seemed so peaceful and calm – a huge contrast to the thoughts that swirled inside Kagome's head like a tornado.

'Love.'

'Does love ever work out for anyone? Here I am, pining away for Inuyasha, who wants Kikyou. Then there's Eri who wants to be with Houjo…but according to her, he likes me. And let's not forget Kouga... Kami, what a mess this is!'

But Kagome by nature was not a melancholy girl, and her natural optimism, her inherent desire to help others soon manifested itself.

'Focus, Kagome…focus. You know you can try to make things better with Eri... make things feel more normal. Houjo…you just need to figure out how to get Houjo to notice her…'

She couldn't help but giggle at the thought of Eri and Houjo becoming a couple. In truth, while Houjo was attractive and pleasant…he just didn't interest Kagome. On the surface, she knew he would be a wonderful person to be in a relationship with – he was a decent boy from a respectable family. But Kagome didn't feel drawn to him, curious about him. In fact, Houjo's presence had quite the opposite effect on her. Eri's words came back to her and Kagome instantly sobered.

"_I know that you think Houjo-kun is…kind of dull. But I swear, it's like he changes when you come around – he's usually not like that – it's like he becomes a different person!..."_

What did Kagome really know about Houjo anyway? Maybe there was more to the boy than appeared on the surface? Or was love just blind, causing Eri to idealize the object of her affection? Kagome did not know, but it was obvious that Eri certainly saw something… something special about Houjo, and that's all that really mattered in the end.

'Just like _you_ think the sun rises and sets on Inuyasha!' Kagome's conscience reminded her.

Inuyasha.

Kagome had actually admitted her feelings about Inuyasha to another person! Her cheeks flushed at the thought. Her words now had power. By saying them out loud, by giving voice to the sentiment, Kagome had freed her heart for a moment only to bind it even tighter. Kagome's feelings were real now. She could no longer try to minimize them…could no longer pretend that they were less. That she wanted less. Kagome wanted _his_ golden gaze to see only her. She wanted _his_ strength to always shield her. She wanted _his_ love. She wanted….she wanted…Inuyasha.

It was this last thought that followed Kagome as drowsiness overtook her. 'Just going to close my eyes for a minute…'

>>>>>>>

"Come on, bitch! We've got shards to find."

Kagome turned to face Inuyasha, only to be presented with his back as he crouched down in front of her. She quickly climbed on to her usual position - hands at his shoulders, her knees up by his waist - acquiescing to his silent demand. His silver hair gleamed in the sunlight as she placed her cheek against the silky mass. Surreptitiously, Kagome inhaled deeply. She loved his scent…it was so warm…so clean…just like a pine forest on a sunny day. Kagome settled herself against his back, feeling protected and secure. As always… same old, same old.

They began to move at Inuyasha's heart stopping pace and Kagome gasped. _This_ was not normal! One of Inuyasha's hands had left its usual, neutral spot at the underside of her knee to travel farther up her thigh.

Kagome bit her lip as she felt a strange fluttery sensation in the pit of her stomach. Did Inuyasha realize what he had just done?

"Inuyasha." She gasped as she felt his claws graze the soft skin of her inner thigh. Heat shot straight through her abdomen to spread out to her extremities. Kagome's heart began pounding as she felt goose bumps break out on her skin. Inuyasha suddenly pulled and shifted the leg that he was paying such unusual attention to, so that Kagome's core was almost flush against his spine when he bent forward.

His clawed hand moved a bit higher, gently stroking her flesh in its ascent. "Inuyasha" she moaned as her fingers twisted and tightened in his haori. These sensations…how she feared them…how she longed for more…

They were no longer moving but Inuyasha still held her on his back. When had they stopped? Kagome hadn't noticed…she couldn't notice anything except for the exquisite tingling in her nerves as Inuyasha's hand kept up its constant movement on her sensitive skin.

"Inuyasha?"

Kagome was surprised to hear the trembling in her voice… Inuyasha had yet to let go of her, in fact, he had yet to turn his head to look at her…or to say anything to her. And suddenly, Kagome needed that more than anything in the world…she needed to see him…wanted to see his face.

"Kagome?"

Something was wrong…that didn't sound like Inuyasha's voice. The pleasurable sensations in her body faded away as Kagome's panic and confusion grew. The voice. It wasn't Inuyasha's usual low pitched timbre…it had a higher quality that sounded familiar…

"Kagome?"

This time the voice was louder and more recognizable. Inuyasha sounded just like… _Sango?!_

>>>>>>

Kagome's eyes shot open in bewilderment only to look into the amused face of the female tajiya.

"Kagome-chan, I know that I can be aggressive at times but I really didn't think you would confuse me with that baka hanyou!" the older girl said with a mischievous smile.

Kagome groaned as her face flushed in embarrassment – just what had she been saying in her sleep?

"Don't worry, Kagome-chan…other than calling out for Inuyasha, I didn't hear anything else." Sango laughed. "Were you about to sit him in your dreams?"

Kagome didn't think her face could feel any hotter or become any redder than it was at the moment. She had dreamt about Inuyasha before…but never had the experience been so intense…so strangely physical. Even now, her skin still tingled as if remembering his phantom touches. And Kagome was mortified to feel an aching wetness between her legs…

'Thank God, Inuyasha is not here. He could probably smell this…'

"Kagome-chan, all teasing aside for now...I promise! I've spent a good amount of time looking for you already. When I said you should rest, I didn't imagine you'd come all the way out here to do so! Kaede-baachan wants to help you get ready for the ceremony since the sun has almost set." Sango smiled as she pulled the younger girl to her feet and started off towards Kaede's hut with Kagome in tow.

A suddenly panicked Kagome cried out, "Sango-chan! Do you think I have time to run home? Because I forgot about the wedding, I left the kimono I was going to wear back in my time."

"Kagome-chan, I really don't think you have to worry about that. I think Kaede-baachan has something specifically for you. Please, let's hurry." Replied Sango as she picked up her pace, an enigmatic smile on her face.

Kagome's heart sank at Sango's response. Whenever possible, Kagome preferred wearing her school uniform - actually, any of the clothes from her time – over the kimono that was the standard garb in the Feudal Era. She was well aware that her clothing made her stand out, marked her as being different. But that was a small price to pay…it was Kagome's way of reminding herself that she really did belong to a different time. Kagome had another reason – one that was closer to her heart - it was also her attempt to distinguish herself from Kikyou, the miko she had been told she resembled, on more than one occasion. The few times that Kagome had been forced to wear more traditional clothing…it had broken her heart to see Inuyasha's reaction. Kagome was never sure if he was seeing her…or the image of Kikyou. While she couldn't do anything about her features, Kagome resolved to never consciously play up her similarity to the dead miko by adopting the clothing of the Feudal Era. It was a small act of rebellion on Kagome's part…a small way of staking her claim to individuality. Kagome fell silent as a stomach churning thought crossed her mind, 'God, I couldn't bear it if Kaede-baachan asked me to wear Kikyou's priestess outfit.'

* * *

In no time at all, Kagome found herself in Kaede's hut, being fussed over by the older miko and Sango.

"Demo, Kaede-baachan, I forgot my kimono…" Kagome began quietly.

"Not to worry child! I have something I think ye will be most pleased to wear." Kaede replied cheerfully.

The old miko moved slowly over to a wooden chest that stood in a corner of the hut and rummaged around in the contents before pulling out a brightly wrapped, large parcel and placing it in Kagome's lap.

Kagome looked up at Sango and Kaede with a confused expression, "What is this?"

"Kagome-chan, open it and you'll see." Sango replied, excitement evident in her voice.

Puzzled by her friends' eager expressions, Kagome turned her attention to the package. Delicate rice paper held in place by a white, silk ribbon shielded the contents from her view. Slowly undoing the ribbon, Kagome gasped as she pulled the rice paper away.

In her hands she held a beautiful kimono - it was a vivid aqua color made of the softest silk Kagome had ever had the pleasure to touch. 'Reminds me of Inuyasha's hair.' She thought wistfully before pushing thoughts of him out of her head. The sleeves were long and flowing, as befitted the furisode style for a young, unmarried woman. But it was the rich, intricate embroidery and brocade that caught Kagome's eye. The artistry, the talent that had gone into making this kimono was incredible. Sakura blossoms and cranes seem to fly across the expanse of aqua silk thanks to the detailed stitching upon the sleeves, hem, and back of the kimono. The beautiful garment was like nothing Kagome had ever seen in her time - it was certainly no mass produced item, put together by a machine according to a template. No, this was absolutely unique…one of a kind. In the modern era, a kimono like this would belong in a museum or in some wealthy collector's possession. With trembling fingers, Kagome reached out to trace a sakura blossom. A faint, woodsy scent wafted up from the material, teasing her nose.

"Who does this belong to?" Kagome whispered softly, still in awe of the beautiful garment sitting in her lap.

"Child, why, it belongs to ye." Replied Kaede in a merry voice as she and Sango exchanged amused glances at Kagome's behavior.

Kagome's head snapped up quickly, "Nani?! Are you serious? How can this be mine?"

A thought sudden occurred to her, almost entirely extinguishing the excitement that had been shining in her eyes, "Kaede-baachan…did this…was this Kikyou's kimono?"

"Kami-sama, no!" cried Kaede, "Child, I do not lie to ye. The kimono belongs to ye alone. Inuyasha was the one who had it made for ye."

"Inuyasha?" whispered Kagome as she clutched the kimono to her chest. "But how…why?"

"I think he must have been paying attention to us talking about what to wear for the spring festival that's coming up, Kagome-chan." Sango replied.

"But, Sango-chan…that was weeks ago! I don't remember either of us talking about the festival recently." Kagome said slowly as her brow furrowed in thought.

"Ah, but that makes sense child, ne? A kimono – especially one such as this - is not assembled so quickly. The hanyou must have commissioned it soon after hearing ye speak with Sango, but I can not be certain of this. I can tell ye that a few days ago, Inuyasha appeared with the package and asked me to give it to ye for the festival. Of course, I made him tell me what I was storing. After all, these bones are too old for nasty tricks. Imagine my surprise…" Kaede chuckled, "And imagine the boy's embarrassment at having to explain himself to me."

Kagome ducked her head slightly so that the other two women could not see the moisture that threatened to gather in her eyes. 'For me? Inuyasha had the kimono _made_ for _me_?'

Sango and Kaede continued to talk amongst themselves as they gathered the items necessary to help the young girl get ready while Kagome sank deeper into her own thoughts. The logical part of Kagome's mind was consumed by a desire for details - How did Inuyasha know anything about women's kimonos? How had he paid for it? How did he know her measurements? But another part of her…a much louder part of her longed to know what Inuyasha had been thinking. Why had he bothered to do this for her?

Kagome did not question Inuyasha's generosity – she knew it was there despite his gruff exterior and surly manners. It was Inuyasha's large heart that allowed him to first forgive Miroku for kidnapping Kagome and stealing the shards, and then Sango for attempting to steal his Tetsusaiga. While he would loudly and colorfully disagree with her opinion, Kagome knew that Inuyasha was capable of deep feelings and selflessness. It was obvious in the way he risked his life for his companions or his actions with regards to Kikyou…

But this…this was something Kagome had _not_ expected. The hanyou was not one to place importance upon material possessions – other than his Tetsusaiga, that is. For him to give her a gift was unusual. For it to be a kimono, something so personal, made it that much more extraordinary. And to think that Inuyasha had it _made_ for her, boggled Kagome's mind.

Kagome's thoughts were interrupted when Sango knelt beside her and gently took the kimono from the miko's hands, "Kagome-chan, let us help you get ready. I'm sure Inuyasha would be pleased if you wore the kimono for the wedding instead of waiting for the festival. It is yours after all."

The younger girl looked up and nodded as her dazed expression slowly turned into one of girlish bliss. Kagome couldn't help the warmth that blossomed in her heart at the thought of Inuyasha taking the time to do something special for her. She couldn't suppress the joy that bubbled inside of her with the knowledge that she would soon be wearing his gift for the village to see.

Kagome's happiness combined with Sango and Kaede's excitement over the wedding left the three feeling lighthearted and cheery. At this moment, there were no shards to collect and Naraku did not exist. There were only three women of varying ages and backgrounds laughing, gossiping, preening and primping as they prepared for the night's festivities.

Whatever Inuyasha's intentions had been, whatever the rest of the night had in store for her, Kagome was sure nothing could make her forget this moment. 'Maybe it's crazy…but I just _know_ that I'll see Inuyasha tonight.' She thought with great certainty, the smile on her face growing wider in anticipation.

* * *

A big thank you to Tami, Cyan I'd, Eloriel, Varethane, Jalison, Mabel-mlv, Mikra, and Firebird Flight for leaving reviews! I love hearing from people who read what I've written…but I know that Ch 1 didn't really give you much to go by. By now, I'm sure you realize that the story will unfold _slowly_ since I think that's the only way things would really happen between Inu-Kag. But, I do hope to pick up the pace once I actually set the foundation going…

I hope y'all stick with me!


	3. Riddles

A/N: It has been a long time since I updated this story. The giddiness of spring has inspired me to dip my toes into the fan fiction pool so to speak 

I have to thank Trusuprise and YoukaiMusashi for their comments on the initial part of this chapter.

Sadly, I have no beta at the moment…so all goofs are most certainly mine!

Ame-No-Mi-Kumari - Shinto water goddess.

---------------------------------------------------------

Inuyasha landed soundlessly in front of the crying child, concentrating his senses for any sign of danger. The boy appeared to be the same age as Souta, Kagome's younger brother. From his coarse clothing and dirt smeared feet and hands, it was obvious that the boy worked on one of the nearby farms – horse farm by the smell of it. Inuyasha could detect no blood scent in the air, so the kid couldn't have been injured by anything.

"Oi, kid! What are you crying for?" called out Inuyasha as he bent down to the child's eye level.

"Are you a d-demon?" The boy stuttered, his tears temporarily forgotten.

Inuyasha's ears twitched in annoyance. Old hurts quickly rushed back to him…he was an object of fear, an object of mistrust and hatred. The worst was seeing children shrink away from him, convinced that he was some terrible monster. Although, the whelps of Kaede's village seemed to follow him around nowadays…he could remember a time when mothers would snatch up their precious offspring if he so much as looked in their direction. Inuyasha did _not _need this sniveling brat to start shrieking in fear. "Keh, this is the last time I try to help anyone out." The hanyou grumbled to himself, knowing full well that he didn't mean it.

"Kid, I ain't gonna hurt you. Just tell me what's wrong and I'll be on my way." Inuyasha managed to spit out in a level voice.

"Youkai-sama…it's my master…he'll be so disappointed with me." Sobbed the boy as fresh tears ran down his dirty face.

Inuyasha aimed a hard golden stare at the boy for a moment as he took in the child's words, "Stop that noise! You mean to tell me you're crying because you've done something to upset your master? Tough shit, kid. I'm sure he'll get over it."

"No, youkai-sama! You don't understand…he trusted me to look after the horses for him while he went to the neighboring village. If I don't have them back before he returns, he might turn me out!"

"First of all kid, I'm not a full youkai…I'm a hanyou, got it? And second…so he turns you out, big deal!"

"But hanyou-sama! I have no place to go if Master Toru won't let me stay! Nobody wants to help an orphan out. And Master Toru has been so kind to me…he hasn't asked for much in return…just that I mind the horses. He says it's important that I not let the horses roam around on their own for too long."

Inuyasha almost didn't hear the rest of the boy's jumbled words, as his mind seemed to catch on one phrase only - _Nobody wants to help an orphan out_. The hanyou knew it all too well, having suffered it first hand. Didn't matter if you were born into a rich family or poor family, human or youkai. Orphans were usually forgotten and ignored. Why pay attention to someone when it only meant an extra mouth to feed, another body to clothe? Orphans were at the bottom of the societal chain – they had nobody to look after them or to mind if they disappeared. Only brute strength, intelligence, and a desire for self preservation would ensure an orphaned child's survival in the Feudal Era.

"Oi, kid! What's so special about these horses anyways?" asked Inuyasha, as he desperately tried to stave off the inevitable. There was no way he could leave the little boy whose eyes reminded him so much of Kagome's brother, to an unknown fate.

"They are kiso horses." The boy proclaimed, pride evident in his voice. Seeing Inuyasha's blank look, he continued. "Right now the horses are used as pack animals for traveling through the mountains and by noblemen and samurai. But Master Toru is convinced that he can get farmers to use them too."

"Keh! That's stupid. Farmers use oxen not horses."

"Master Toru says that one day, farmers _will_ use them and I believe him." The boy replied stubbornly.

"What's so bad if they wander around on their own?"

"Hanyou-sama, Master Toru says that if the horses spend too much time out of their pen they will turn wild again and be harder to control."

Inuyasha rolled his eyes at this statement, 'Stupid humans…don't they know that if something is wild, it will _always_ be wild?' before getting back to the matter at hand.

"So, just how did these special horses escape? Did they grow wings?"

The boy suddenly looked down in shame and replied in a quiet voice, "I must not have closed the gate."

"Keh." Inuyasha contemplated the boy's slumped shoulders for a moment.

"Kid, the name is Inuyasha. What's yours?"

"Tetsuya."

"Well, Tetsuya, what are you waiting for…we've got horses to catch!"

-------------------------------------------------------

Inuyasha grunted in satisfaction as the last of the missing horses galloped into the horse pen and Tetsuya shut the gate. Searching out the horses had taken very little effort on Inuyasha's part, since they had not traveled far away from the farm. There had been something very primal and satisfying about using his senses to track and hunt down the animals. And every time he had scared his quarry into running towards the open gate, Inuyasha had seen the awe on Tetsuya's face grow. Inuyasha had felt an answering warmth blossom in his chest… it felt good for the boy to look at him without fear or disgust. It felt good to be admired – perhaps this was the reason he put up with Souta's attention?

"Inuyasha-sama, I can't offer you anything for your troubles…but please, come with me, you must be thirsty."

Inuyasha allowed the boy to lead him to the lake he had seen from the cliff. It was even more startling up close. Once again, the waters were so calm that the surface seemed to be a polished mirror, perfectly reflecting the fiery oranges and reds of the setting sun, and Inuyasha could not recall ever smelling such freshness, such sweetness from a body of water before. He was suddenly gripped by a huge thirst, a desire to taste the clear liquid that lay before him. Almost before he realized what he was doing, Inuyasha found himself bending over and bringing the cool water to his lips with cupped hands. He drank greedily as if he had just traveled through miles of arid desert.

"Hanyou, the waters of life soothe you, do they not?" came the sibilant whisper of a woman's voice.

Inuyasha looked up in shock to see a beautiful woman dressed in a rich kimono made of iridescent blue and green material, patterned with all manner of sea creatures. Her black hair shimmered with an almost green tint and her skin was smooth like luminescent pearl. But it was the woman's eyes…the changing color of the woman's eyes that initially caught his attention, along with the fact that the woman appeared to be standing on top of the water's surface. Inuyasha's senses blazed to life as he furiously tried to assess whether this woman…this creature, presented any threat to him.

"Who the hell are you?" he snarled angrily as his hand flew to the hilt of Tetsusaiga. How had she been able to sneak up on him? Inuyasha could only barely detect the faint hum of power…an ancient magic. She was not emitting any youki and he could not detect Naraku's scent…but that did not mean the woman was harmless.

"Calm yourself, hanyou. No harm shall befall you here. I wish only to speak with you." She replied in a sing-song voice.

"I don't trust anyone who sneaks up on an opponent." Inuyasha spat back.

The woman stared at him thoughtfully for a moment and then directed her attention to the boy standing agape behind Inuyasha, "Child, please leave us. The hanyou and I have some business to attend to. After all, he has done you a great kindness and must be compensated, ne?"

"Inuyasha-sama?" came the boy's soft voice.

"Get out of here, kid! This could get ugly." Inuyasha replied as he made a show of cracking his knuckles, his eyes focused on the woman standing before him.

To his surprise, she laughed. The sound was clear and merry, reminding him of water splashing over rocks.

"Oi, what are you laughing at?" he snarled in irritation.

"I am in the presence of the hanyou, Inuyasha, correct?"

"What's it to you?"

"Peace, hanyou, peace. Are you not the one who restored Trident of Amakoi to the water goddess, Sujin?"

Confused by this sudden shift in the conversation, Inuyasha could only nod dumbly.

"It is as I suspected. Inuyasha, what is it you wish?"

If Inuyasha had been confused before, he was doubly so now. "Wish?" he repeated stupidly.

"Inuyasha…you stand before the goddess Ame-No-Mi-Kumari at the sacred Mirror Lake. Surely, there is something you desire? Sujin was still too weak from having been sealed to properly reward you for freeing her and dealing with the imposter who had usurped her throne. But Sujin is one of my favorite attendants, and I can not allow your service to her to go unrewarded."

"I don't need anything from you." Inuyasha replied and made as if to move away.

"Are you entirely sure that you do not wish for anything? Look into the Lake…I can see your heart's desires there."

Almost against his will, Inuyasha found himself looking down into the water's eerily smooth surface. As expected, he saw himself reflected…but suddenly the image rippled as if a pebble had disturbed the water. When the surface stilled Inuyasha gasped – the image was of Kagome's shining face.

"What…what is the meaning of this dark magic?"

"Foolish Inuyasha. Magic, yes. Dark, no. Water is the essence of life…without it, you could not exist. It wears away the hardest stone over time yet has no form of its own. Water cleanses, heals, and raises life from the dust. Water can also take that same life away, leaving nothing behind. You have tasted from the Mirror Lake, and the Lake will show you what desires are buried in your soul…look again."

Inuyasha again felt helpless to disobey this command as apprehension and curiosity warred equally within him.

_There was Kagome again, head raised slightly so that the firelight reflected off the dark pools of her eyes. Her pale skin was tinted gold by the flickering flames of small fire, a soft blush stained her cheeks and traveled down her neck as she looked up at him. Kagome's ebony locks spilled down her back and shoulders like silk, swaying gently with the movements of an unseen breeze. Inuyasha watched as Kagome's tongue darted out to wet her rosy lips. He had been so mesmerized by Kagome's face, that it had taken Inuyasha a little while to notice that she was wearing his red haori instead of her usual white and green fuku. The crimson material was tied loosely around her petite form as one of her slender hands clutched the edges over her chest, keeping her breasts hidden from his view. Kagome suddenly extended her other hand out towards him – a silent plea that he come to her. Her movement pulled at the material that was covering her, causing it to slide down her creamy shoulders, baring her skin to his gaze… Another ripple went through the scene and Inuyasha was shocked to see his own image join Kagome's._

_  
Both of them were naked as they faced one another. Inuyasha watched his image slowly reached for Kagome with a clawed hand to touch her cheek. Kagome's eyes closed as she leaned into his touch, nuzzling against his skin before placing a kiss on the center of his palm. His image then leaned down and pressed his lips to hers. Kagome appeared not only to welcome the contact but to encourage it, as she twined her arms around his neck and tangled her fingers into his silver hair. The figures in the water were pressed together so tightly, that Inuyasha could not see any space between them. In a sudden move, his image pulled Kagome's body up against his own so that her feet no longer touched the ground. Kagome automatically raised her legs and wrapped them tightly around his waist._

_  
As one, they moved, lips and hands feverishly in contact the entire time. His image lowered Kagome to the ground and settled on top of her…. _

With a great force of will, Inuyasha jerked his head back. The scene had been too intense, too personal to watch…especially in front of an audience. Inuyasha felt as if he had been looking at one of Kagome's moving pictures. It was galling to think that Ame-No-Mi-Kumari had seen the images as well, that she knew what greedy desires, what lustful dreams he harbored in his heart. And yet, before now he had been unable to look away…every ounce of him had wanted to see this…the culmination of many nights spent dreaming about Kagome. Strangely enough, unlike the fantasies which heated his blood and left him in an uncomfortable state of arousal, the images that he had just seen hadn't ignited his lust. Part of Inuyasha felt cheated by that fact but mostly, he was grateful to the magic that had kept him from embarrassing himself in front of the goddess. Rather than arousal, Inuyasha's blood thrummed with jealous anger towards his image …of what _he_ had been doing with Kagome. Inuyasha smelled the scent of his own blood before he was aware that he had been digging his claws into the palms of his own hands.

"Inuyasha, will you deny that you want this woman – body and soul?" Ame-No-Mi-Kumari's voice floated to his ears.

An image of Kikyou's sad face flashed before Inuyasha's eyes, causing him to bite his lip.

"Or does your promise to the dead mean more than the living?"

At his silence, Ame-No-Mi-Kumari continued her questioning, the softly spoken words hammering at Inuyasha's heart. "Tell me Inuyasha, do you follow bushido - the way of the warrior? Do you hold your honor, your ideals above all else…above the feelings of those whose lives you touch? Above your own feelings?"

Inuyasha looked at Ame-No-Mi-Kumari in astonishment before he gave way to the anger spurred by her words, "You don't know shit about me!"

Ame-No-Mi-Kumari's eyes flashed dangerously and the surface of the lake began churning for a moment before the waters settled again. "You forget your place, hanyou. I will overlook your impertinence this once, but do _not_ test my patience again."

Inuyasha gulped and nodded. If his time with Kagome and Sango had taught him anything, it was that an angry woman was a force to be reckoned with. He wasn't stupid enough to find out what an angry goddess would do if pushed too far.

Ame-No-Mi-Kumari sighed as she contemplated him then said, "Inuyasha, I will leave you with these final thoughts. Look into the waters of the Lake again and tell me what you see."

Half afraid to see more images of himself with Kagome, Inuyasha again complied with the water goddess' demand.

"There's a large koi swimming around." Inuyasha said in relief, as he watched the red and silver patterned fish energetically glide through the water.

"Good. Now tell me Inuyasha, what would happen if someone was to capture the koi, take it out of the water, and leave it on the shore of the lake?"

Rolling his eyes, Inuyasha suppressed the urge to say something about the stupidity of the question, "Keh, fish can't survive without water."

"Look again. What would happen if someone was to take that struggling fish away from the dry land and place it in a small basin of water?

"What the hell are –"

"Answer the question, hanyou!" She hissed as her eyes flashed dangerously again.

Inuyasha looked back at the image of the colorful fish as it swam circles in the confines of a metal basin. "It would live…in a very small space."

"Do you suppose the koi would miss the freedom of the waters it had been taken from and feel trapped?

"Or do you think the koi would be grateful not to be struggling for lack of water?"

"How am I supposed to know what a fish feels? If it feels at all?" Inuyasha answered, impatience evident in his voice.

"Hanyou, all living creatures are sentient beings. Just because you do not understand their language does not mean they are incapable of it. Answer me."

"Keh!" Inuyasha squinted his eyes at the image of the colorful fish swimming around in the small basin. "I s'ppose," he began softly, "It would be a combination of the two. The koi would feel grateful just to be alive…to feel the water again after it had been deprived of it. The fish might try to convince itself that it had never been in a huge lake with so much water and freedom in the first place, that it didn't belong there. If it convinced itself of this, it wouldn't miss it."

"Final question, hanyou. What if the Kami gave the koi a choice? To stay in the small basin or be returned to the freedom and lightness of open water. What would the fish choose?"

Inuyasha looked down at the water, a faraway expression in his eyes as he murmured, "If given a choice…would the koi be brave enough to try again? To chance being returned to the lake, knowing all the while that the same thing could happen…that he could be captured and left to struggle again? Or would he stay where he was, relying on the certainty of a small amount of water?"

"Either way spells danger for the koi, does it not, Inuyasha? If he chooses to return to the lake…he can experience the joy, the freedom of movement again. But with freedom comes the potential for loss, for pain. If he stays where he is, relying on the shallow waters of memory to sustain him, his survival is uncertain as well. So I ask you, which choice will leave the koi with greater satisfaction? A life where chances are taken or one where it swims in a small circle?"

Inuyasha looked up, mouth opening to ask another question, only to find that Ame-No-Mi-Kumari had disappeared, just as silently as she had arrived. He was alone again. And for the second time that day, his head was too full of thoughts.

"Goddess or not, I ain't no damn fish." Inuyasha grumbled to himself, but not before he took a careful look around. Throughout his life, Inuyasha had made many enemies for himself, but he had no desire to add a goddess to the list.

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Kagome could barely suppress her excitement. Not for the first time, she was awed by how her travels in the Feudal Era gave her the opportunity to witness the history that her friends could only read about in books. Wedding ceremonies in modern Japan had come under a great deal of Western influence with people opting to get married in churches; more brides wore white gowns and veils instead of the more traditional kimono. The chance to witness a traditional Shinto ceremony – a completely authentic one – devoid of the influence of modern customs and attitudes was too great to pass up. Kagome allowed herself a small self deprecating smile. Of course, she, Miroku, and even Kaede had not been invited by Taka-sama to witness the wedding out of his generosity. As the village's official Miko and unofficial godmother, it would be unthinkable to exclude Kaede from such an auspicious event. In a rather shrewd move to both impress his new in-laws and the villagers, as well as any Kami that might be paying attention to mortal affairs in Musashi's domain, Taka-sama had invited Kagome and Miroku to bear witness to his daughter's nuptials.

"_Of course, we will be honored to have the esteemed seekers of the Shikon jewel who bear such sacred powers in our humble dwelling on such a happy occasion." Taka-sama had declared in a loud tone. _

_Kagome tried to hide a smile as she took in the look of surprise on the passing villagers' faces. Old Taka-sama had made his rather bold invitation at high noon in the village square. By the end of the day, Kagome was certain that the entire village would know about the invitation…she would bet the shikon shards on it._

Movement caught her attention and broke Kagome's reverie; she turned to watch as two priests clad in white robes knelt at the front of the room before a wall in which hung a scroll bearing the names of the Kami. While she, Kaede, and Miroku had been invited to attend the ceremony to "bless" the occasion, it turned out that old Taka-sama was even shrewder than Kagome had originally thought. The actual blessing and ceremony were to be performed by priests from a nearby shrine – one that Taka-sama traded often with. Kagome didn't mind…being treated as an esteemed guest allowed her to forgo traditional miko robes in favor of a pretty kimono. The young girl blushed as she smoothed a hand over the soft aqua silk on her arm. Of course, she was not just wearing _any _kimono but one that _Inuyasha_ had made for her. Forcing her thoughts back to the present, she gazed at the raised lacquered platform standing below the scroll that held rice cakes and a jug of sake, which had been blessed by the holy men in attendance. Two maidens wearing the hooded cloaks of Shinto shrine attendants, stood near the priests. On the tatami to the left of the platform knelt Taka, the bride's father with his friends. To the right of the platform, sat the groom's wedding party. In front of the altar knelt the bride and groom. The former wore black ceremonial robes depicting his family's crest and two swords strapped at his waist. The latter was swathed in a white silk kimono and a long white, silk veil that completely covered her face and hair. The couple faced a glazed ceramic dish that contained miniature pine and plum trees, a bamboo grove, and statues of a hare and crane: symbols of longevity, pliancy, and faithfulness.

One of the priests waved a long wand from which white paper strips hung as he chanted an invocation to the Shinto gods to purify the room. The second priest played a series of high pitched notes on a flute, while the first accompanied him by beating a drum. The music abruptly stopped. An attendant moved the container of consecrated sake in front of the couple along with a tray containing three flat wooden bowls. The attendant filled the smallest cup, bowed, and then handed it to the bride who lifted the sake cup to her lips and drank. The process was repeated three times. Then the attendant refilled the cup and passed it to the groom. The remaining cups were also filled and passed to the bride and groom in a similar manner.

Once again, Kagome found her attention wavering from the scene before her. The ancient ceremony that she was witnessing felt so _right_ to her. While the more western custom of the bride wearing a white dress and groom wearing a tuxedo to exchange vows had become popular in Japan, Kagome could never picture her own wedding like that. She had always kept quiet during her lunches with Eri, Ayame, and Yuka when they would fantasize about their future wedding days; sometimes she thought it was because she could never see herself getting married. Seeing the scene before her made Kagome realize just why it had always been so difficult. The traditional outfits, with an age old ceremony to bind the lives of two lovers…_this_ was how she wanted to do it. Kagome could easily see herself wearing a traditional white kimono and white veil while sitting next to her groom who would be clad in a black kimono. Only instead of two swords at her groom's waist, she could only picture one – the Tetsusaiga…

An embarrassed flush shot through Kagome's body as her cheeks reddened in self awareness of her thoughts.

'Calm down, girl. It's normal to imagine your own wedding day when you're a guest at one…besides, it's not like anyone here is a mind reader.' On the heels of this thought, Kagome took a quick peek around to make sure nobody was looking at her. In an era where demons and black mikos existed, you couldn't be too careful of your thoughts remaining to yourself.

'So, now it's okay to admit to yourself that you want Inuyasha to be your husband?' came a little snide voice.

'Aack! Must change topic…think of something else, anything else.' Kagome chastised herself.

But it seemed that her treacherous heart was on a roll. The harder she tried to focus on the actual scene in front of her, the more she was able to visualize herself and Inuyasha as the actual participants. Kagome's cheeks flushed at the thought. Ever since she had confessed her love of Inuyasha to Eri, it seemed that Kagome's feelings were simmering under the surface, ready to boil over with the slightest emotional provocation. And witnessing the sacred union between two individuals was fueling daydreams of Kagome's most carefully guarded secret wish. The extreme bliss at the thought of participating in the sake ceremony with Inuyasha under the watchful eyes of loved ones, made her giddy. But the more rational side of Kagome's brain couldn't help but seize upon all the unknowns.

While she knew she held Inuyasha's affection to some degree, affection did not equal love. Affection did not equal a lifetime commitment - a sharing of minds, hearts, and bodies. And there was the ever present shadow of Kikyou that loomed larger than life in Inuyasha's memories and in all of their encounters with the resurrected miko. Even more importantly, Kagome had no idea what the Kami had in store for her. After all, her very presence in medieval Japan was in defiance of the natural order of time and space.

Two years ago, Kagome had become a huge believer in Fate. If not for that strange and divine force, how else would she have been able to travel back in time to an age where demons and magic were everyday facts and not just fodder for bedtime stories? True, her life had been turned around and she had become a stranger in her own time. But Kagome fervently believed she was _meant _to be here in this time, to meet her Feudal Era friends. She had no doubts about her purpose for the moment.

But what would happen once Kagome fulfilled her duty? Would the same forces that conspired to magically send her centuries into the past decide to close the Bone Eater's Well? Would she be forced to choose which side of a 500 year divide she wanted to live out her remaining years on, forever giving up her loved ones on the other side? Would she even be _given _a choice?

This last thought caused Kagome to break out into a cold sweat, forcing her to dig her nails into her hands as a feeling of dread coiled in her stomach and she tasted bile. All of a sudden the room was too small and Kagome felt trapped…trapped by the walls…trapped by Fate…trapped by a future she didn't know she had any control over. Luck was on Kagome's side however and she was relieved to see that the ceremony was now over; it was safe to get up.

Making her way towards the door, Kagome murmured congratulations to the other guests, trying to keep a smile on her face all the while keeping her clenched fists concealed in the folds of her kimono. Her thoughts were stifling her and she could feel the moisture gathering in her eyes…she _had to get out of here!_

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A/N: A most sincere THANK YOU to those who've reviewed and emailed me during the last two years, urging me to update.

I can't really express how much reviews mean to me as a writer. To think I might be providing someone out there with some level of entertainment is very humbling.

So thank you thank you thank you for taking the time to review!

If you're interested in reading more about Kiso horses:

The Kiso horse is medium sized, standing about 13 hands (135 cm). During the Meiji Era, Kiso horses were crossbred with many western breeds and the pure stain virtually disappeared. The breed is being preserved in the region centering on Kaida mura in Kiso County, Nagano Prefecture. There are today 117 Kiso horses, which are often seen in processions in local festivals. They are also used as riding horses.


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